Our Rec Room

Links for 1/6/2012

2012-01-06T11:03:00.001-05:00

Come!
Impossible to be Discouraged
Vestigal Organs
There in Heaven
Joseph's Response
Speedy stone
Why Is God Silent in My Life?

Climby Climberson

2012-01-05T12:22:00.000-05:00

I'm working on a longer post. But I wanted to take time out to tell you about Sammie's new adventures. We've always had difficulty keeping her off the stairs, so we make sure we have a gate across the bottom of the stairs, and generally we let her wander through out the house. But she now she has been adding to her repertoire of climbing starting here:

Then she progressed here:

Then to here:

Now she's taking a foot stool to climb on the couch and the other day, Janet found her in the middle of out dining room table. She is smart and dangerous.

In Him,

Jim

Links For 1/5/2012

2012-01-05T09:58:00.000-05:00

The Extraordinary Birth of Jesus
Third thoughts about Matthew 28:19 in Greek — a command, or not?
Have a Merry Christmas
My Soul, as a Blank

2012

2012-01-04T09:48:00.000-05:00

2012 has arrived. For me there was no fanfare and no party, I was asleep when it arrived. I woke up and and went downstairs to see Janet and the girls quietly watching television. We spent the day watching movies and just enjoying each other. And then we retired to bed again.

As the days have rolled on I have felt there are many things I want to do.

I want to teach the Bible. I have approached those at our church about doing that, but as of yet no opportunity has presented itself. So I am going to pray and look for a venue to do this.
In the past year I have posted three fewer posts on this than in 2011. My goal is to double that number at least, but I'm shooting for at least one per week for a grand total of 56.
I like television and I see nothing wrong with it, but it can be a time waster when you watch the same programs over and over again. I want to cut that back and fill that time with reading. I want to read at least one book per week. It may be really easy, I'll just encourage Janet to watch more cooking shows, not that she needs it. She likes them and I don't, so I read instead.
I want to listen to at least one Biblical podcast per day. I can do that while I work so that shouldn't be an issue.
I need to start walking more, mainly because my cardiologist has suggested it and partly because I really need more exercise.

I think these are attainable goals without changing my life too much. I hope you will help keep me accountable.

In Him,
Jim

Links For 12/29/2011

2011-12-29T07:58:00.000-05:00

Let us not dictate to God
Top Ten Theologians: #2 – Martin Luther
Monday Morning Humor... Again
Top Ten Books of 2011

Justification: a parable of the parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector

“. . . not afraid to die”

My Top Ten (!) Books of the Year

On Learned and Unlearned Ministers

When I took this step . . .

Gary Habermas on Doubt

Sadness

2011-12-29T06:39:00.000-05:00

Recently, I was saddened when a friend announced that he was "officially divorced." We have had a long standing friendship, that dates back to my Navy days, but we haven't really seen each other in years. We were part of a close knit fellowship of believers on board the ship I was stationed on toward the end of my enlistment. I'll tell you more about them later.

When I say that I was saddened, I'm not sure that actually describes it. My heart began to ache, literally.

I was saddened not only for the end of this marriage, but also for the number of my friends who are no longer walking with the Lord. I was saddened for the number of years when I did not walk with the Lord.

It saddens me when I know someone who has died does not know the Lord. It makes it all the more urgent for each of us to share the good news story. To share our story.

Links for 12/28/2011

2011-12-28T13:22:00.000-05:00

Psalm 22
A Parable of a Spiritual Heart
We are not our own
How Carl Henry came to Christ
Heaven is Your Snow Day
Six Helps for Sufferers
The Problem with the Prosperity Gospel
You also . . .
A Sneak Peak at 2012
Getting Inerrancy Wrong

I've Got to Brag

2011-09-29T09:59:00.001-04:00

I have to take a moment to brag on Katie. This morning we went into WAWA as we normally do. I got my usual 24 ounce cup of coffee and some bacon for Katie. I paid and as we left, we encounter this woman at the door. Katie looked at her and said "You dropped this," and handed her a five dollar bill. The woman was so surprised and thrilled with Katie's honesty, she gave her the five dollars. I was so proud of her, I began to cry. I held her close and told her I was extremely proud of her. Those are the moments we fathers love and I hope to see many more.

Links

2011-07-13T10:12:00.001-04:00

Why do Men have nipples?

House Committee will Investigate Kagan's Role in Obamacare

Sunday Quote: Francis Schaeffer on Presuppositions

An Open Window Into The Heart of Calvin

Why I Am/Not Charismatic

Terminology Tuesday: Documentary Hypothesis

Is it Okay for Christians to Believe in the Doctrine of Hell But Not Like It?

The embarrassment of renewal

How Can We Stand on Scripture in an Evolution-Pushing Culture?

God Sighting

2011-07-12T18:52:00.002-04:00

It the first night of Vacation Bible School and Katie wasn't herself. h In fact she spent much of the night crying. This was a big difference from the girl who had been pestering us all day about going to VBS.
We had invited her friend Nav to be a part of the activities.
During a game that looked a lot like freeze tag, Nav held the weepy Katie's hand as they walked together from one side of the gym to the other.
Thank you God for little girls like Nav.

Links

2011-06-29T21:36:00.001-04:00

Open Letter to Governor Andrew M. Cuomo

The Moon: The Light that rules the Night

My Dad's Five Vows

Tire-Kicker Christianity

Links

2011-06-28T09:02:00.001-04:00

My Savior, My Provider

Same-Sex Marriage Challenges and Responses

Beck, Sting

Is all Interpretation Created Equal?

Terminology Tuesday: Dialectic

(Less) tersely put: Omniciense and Certainty Revisited

Some Links

2011-06-27T12:44:00.001-04:00

An Eleven Year Old has the Answer

Why compromise doesn’t work

Unsportsmanlike Conduct

The Urgency of Evangelistic Duty

Sunday Quote: F.F. Bruce on the New Testament Canon

Fav #3: He knows what I mean

The Empire State's Moral Revolution

Happy Fun Ball

Does God Feel Distant?

What does tolerance really mean?

2011-06-21T09:43:00.007-04:00

“From its beginning, the new continent seemed destined to be the home of religious tolerance. Those who claimed the right of individual choice for themselves finally had to grant it to others.”– Calvin Coolidge, May 3, 1925

“The frustrating thing is that those who are attacking religion claim they are doing it in the name of tolerance. Question: Isn’t the real truth that they are intolerant of religion?” - Ronald Reagan, August 23, 1984

So who really needs to be tolerant? In the name of tolerance it appears our freedom of religion is being eradicated.

Father’s Day

2011-06-19T16:40:00.001-04:00

My father and I do not have that great relationship. I’m not even sure it could be considered good. It wasn’t always like that. As a boy, as I imagine with all boys, he was an extremely big part of my life.

I think the change started when I was six. Dad had always been there, but suddenly he wasn’t. I found out years later he had volunteered to go on TDY more often and we didn’t see him very often.

After my parents divorced we saw him even less. I think it was about once every three years. But still the relationship did not strain.

After I left home things started going home. I started to become sensitive to the negative things he would say about Mom. I made it very clear that I did no want to hear those kind of things about my mother. It was then that he started to talk about how bitter he was over the divorce. But I found out later it was his infidelity that was largely responsible for the divorce.

Even so, I love him, in spite of the many broken promises, and the unkind words, not toward me but to my brother. I try to maintain that relationship, but whenever we speak it feels strained.

I am envious of those who have great relationships with their fathers and those whose parents love the Lord. For this reason, I pray to be the father my children that my father never was to me. I pray to be the father that God wants all fathers to be.

It's Official

2011-06-14T12:43:00.001-04:00

When last we spoke, we had been left with the possibility that Katie might be autistic. Or at least that's what the therapist was thinking. Well we cancelled the next appointment with the therapist, not because it was something we didn't want to hear, but because we had a meeting with Katie's neurologist about her seizures. He also handles ADHD. We told him what the therapist said. I think that's the first time I've ever seen a doctor roll his eyes. Apparently that's the "in thing." well we don't want Katie to have the "in thing." We would really rather she just be a normal little girl.

Dr. F. (The neurologist) prescribed an extremely small dose of medicine and a week later we are seeing a different child. She is much more focused than I could have hoped and is not bouncing off the walls nearly as much. I say thank God for Dr. F.

I Don't See It

2011-06-03T12:16:00.001-04:00

We have known for some time that Katie has some problems that are manifesting themselve in her school work. When a child can read a sentene extremely well one minute and the next minute it appears to be Greek, there is definitely a problem. In order to be good parents, we sought help from our primary care physician, who then gave us a set of questionaires (one for us and one for her teacher) to fill. Based upon the results of those, she referred us to a child psychologist.

There was some difficulty getting in to see her, because she preferred to make her own appointments. So it was a while before she returned my call, I had almost given up hope. We took Katie to see her and then the tests began. Being an extremely (and I do mean extremely active) six year old, there was difficulty in getting her to sit for any length of time. They really should see her at home. The phrase bing-bing-bing comes to mind. If you don't understand the phrase then you either: don't have children or have very placid children.

The day of reckoning came last Wednesday, the results from the tests. One of the first words I remeber hear was "quirky." The doctor appeared to think Katie had "quirky" behavior. I don't think I've ever heard that word in modern conversation. I would have to agree that there is a quirkiness to Katie, but I don't necessarily think that's a negative. I love her personality and the way she just loves everyone, we all could learn from that.

Then came the word "autistic." I could tell you I was floored, but it would be a lie. It had crossed my mind once or twice, but never really settled in. I'll confess I didn't know what being autistic really meant. This was not necessarily a diagnostic at this point, but it needs to be ruled out.

I've since done some research and I'm going to have to say, I don't see it. It's not because I don't want to, but autism appears to be social disorder wherein the child has difficulty in social settings. That doesn't appear to be Katie's problem, her problem as I see it is difficulty in focusing. That appears to be more of an ADHD type of issue.

I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination, but I do know my child. I would appreciate your prayers, particularly that I would be a help and champion for Katie, in addition to a good and godly father.

Our Katie

2011-05-18T20:37:00.001-04:00

It’s been over five years now since Katie has become a part of our life. I remember that when she came, I jumped right in to take care of her. I’m not sure of what I was thinking at the time, I just know that she was so little and needed me. She was eleven months and just sitting up. She didn’t crawl. We could sit her on the floor and walk away and be assured that she would still be there when we returned. She was small and tiny, and according to the doctor in the lower 25 percentile weight wise for her age. Her condition was such that doctor diagnosed her as failure to thrive.

I remember the first weekend we brought her home, I’m not sure which one of us noticed, but she was running a fever and not very happy, to say the least. Well, Janet suggested we take her to a clinic (it was Sunday) so that she could be checked out. The doctor on call, was more concerned about her development than about her fever. So we took her home, but her fever worsened, rising to 105. As her fever rose so did our concern, we decided to take her to an emergency room. Being a first time father (or father figure) I listened very closely to everything that was said. They decided to take x-rays, and from those they determined she had pneumonia. We were sent home with a prescription and instructions for the care of this poor sick child.

Janet decided to stay home and take care of her, and I being the dutiful husband went off to work. Sometime before lunch, I called to see how things were going and I could tell that they weren’t going that great. Janet was having a hard time taking care of Katie and doing things like taking a shower or eating. Every time she would put Katie down she would cry. I asked her if she wanted me to come home, and she eagerly said yes.

When I got home, I took charge of Katie while Janet showered, ate and ran errands. Katie was still running a fever and very uncomfortable. I remembered the nurse said from the night before that we would want to remove clothes enough that she wasn’t shivering and take a washcloth and wipe her down with that. So I remove her pajamas, left on her diaper (I’m not a daredevil) and began wiping her down with a lukewarm washcloth. As I wiped, I could see the redness in her ears and face dissipate and she began to settle down. Eventually she went to sleep on my chest.

She has slept many times on my chest since then and now she is getting so big that it is not comfortable for either one of us. Sometimes, I long for those days and at other times I sit amazed at how far she has come.

I started out being “Poppa” for her and once she asked me if I was “Poppa” or “Daddy” and I said I am whoever she needed me to be. I’ve been “Daddy” ever since.

Tomorrow night, she graduates from Kindergarten. We’ve come a long way and I’ve loved every minute of it. But I think I’m ill prepared for her to grow up, but I am still prepared to be whatever she needs me to be.

Left Behind Stories

2011-04-22T09:58:00.001-04:00

I'm going to have to admit something. I love the Left Behind Series. Some of you, well since there's only three followers, I'm pretty sure it's going to be all of you, may be shocked. I've read every single one of them and have listened to the audio presentation at least twice.

I know it's fiction, but there just something about the stories of faith. I often think of how wonderful it would be to be able to live out a faith like that. The stories of the men and women in these books hungering for the Word of God, and being driven to their knees in constant prayer. I love it when someone in the stories realizes their need for Jesus and gives their lives over to Him.

These stories happen in real life everyday, but somehow I feel like I miss the mark. I love Jesus, and I love His word. Lately it has been very exciting to me to read and study. But the consistencey eludes me. I would love to be in it every day, but sometimes I have to settle for three of four times a week. I want that relationship with Christ that will inspire others to seek it, to want it, to covet it. If there were anything in life we should covet it is that relationship with Christ.

Our Sunday School class has agreed to pray for each other, but specifically a prayer from Colossians 1:9-12

And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. ESV

I would like to pray this for you, and hopefully you will pray it for me. Leave me a comment asking me to pray and I will, right then and there.

In His Name.

Nate the Snake

2011-03-01T12:45:00.001-05:00

After God had created the heavens and the earth and after He rested and finally after the fall, He added to the earth a lever in the middle of nowhere. This lever was very important for if it were switched on it would destroy the whole earth. And because man had become sinful and depraved, He knew the lever must be guarded, so He employed a snake named Nate.

After many years of Nate slithering around and guarding this lever, a man approached Nate and said "Hey, Nate." How he knew Nate's name I do not know. Nate replied "Hey, what?" The man said "I am a great talent agent and I can get you great roles in many movies in Hollywood."

Well Nate thought about it and having many human qualities said "Well God will never know." So off he went to star in movies. His career was quite successful. He starred in movies like "Sssssssss" and costarred in "Frogs." After a time his career began to wane, so he decided it was time for him to go back to the lever.

Lo and behold, a great 12 lane super highway had been built up with the lever in the median. This would have never happened if Nate had stayed at his post. Nate from the side of the highway noticed something alarming: In the median was a madman bent on destroying the world making his way to the lever.

With great urgency Nate began to slither across the highway, dodging the traffic the best he could.

The driver of an 18 wheeler bearing down upon Nate, recognized Nate and being a fan averted the truck to the median, killing the madman. But driver saw that he was about to hit the lever and destroy the world, so he pulled back onto the highway, mangling and killing Nate.

The moral of the story: Better Nate than lever.

Slave

2011-01-24T10:41:00.000-05:00

Would you be willing to consider yourself a slave? To surrender yourself totally to God. How do you feel about giving up complete freedom. Or are you still a slave to sin? That's the topic of John MacArthur's new book (at least to me) Slave. I had the privilege of reading this book as the first book by John MacArthur I have ever read.

Except for the idea that he believes that there has been a "cover up" in the translation of the bible in which the Greek word "doulos" has been translated "servant" instead of "slave," there is nothing earth shattering that I could see.

I'm not saying this isn't a good book, because I did enjoy it. It is a good reminder to us that we are ultimately slaves either to sin or willing ones to the Lord. He uses a great deal of historical information to show what it is like to be a slave during Roman and Biblical times. Because I like the history behind the Bible, I found this to be enjoyable.

He also uses this book promote Calvinism, by saying essentially that slaves do not choose their master. Maybe promote is not the word. I did not agree with his assessment with that.

Overall I thought book was worth a read and not a difficult one at that. I have nothing to compare this book to, but having listened to Dr. MacArthur's sermons for years I can't imagine this was his best work.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com <http://BookSneeze®.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 <http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/waisidx_03/16cfr255_03.html> : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

What's On Your Tivo?

2011-01-17T13:22:00.001-05:00

We have a Tivo. There's a unique feature with Tivo in that it will make recommendations based upon your television watching history. I wonder how many of us would not be embarrassed by what Tivo would recommend.

Peace About Death

2011-01-14T14:24:00.001-05:00

About twenty years ago I had a problem. Okay I have problems now, but this was a major health problem. Whenever I lay on my right side I was having difficulty breathing. Not being an alarmist or anything, I went to the doctor for the chronic nose bleeds I was having and casually mentioned this problem. I was a bit taken aback when he seemed more concerned over the breathing issue that the nose bleeds. Apparently chronic nose bleeds are more common than breathing issues.

He scheduled me for an xray which showed that I either had a collapsed lung or there was fluid in my chest cavity. Are you grossed out yet? He believed that the collapsed lung was more likely since I was young and fluid in the chest cavity is not that common. Guess which one it was.

Well the next step was to drain out the fluid and find out the cause. Draining the fluid turned out to be no picnic, it was done by sticking a needle in my chest cavity from the back and letting drain. It was uncomfortable. After which I endured a series of tests, from a catheterization to testing the bone marrow. When the bone marrow was removed it was so painful even with a local that I vomited my lunch and then some. I'll bet that grossed you out.

Most of the tests revealed nothing, but it was discovered that I had a calcified pericardium. That's the sack around that heart and it a calcium buildup. It was thick and getting thicker. The only way to fix it was through heart surgery. Yep they cracked my chest.

Obviously things worked out fine, except now they believe I have an irregular heartbeat from it. But I tell you this story to tell you this, through it all I had peace that if I had died I would be sitting in front of Jesus that very day. Do you have that peace?

Daddy I'm Going To Marry You

2011-01-14T07:56:00.001-05:00

Yesterday morning Katie said to me as I carried her into school, "Daddy I'm going to marry you." I was happy to hear her say that not because I ever expect to marry her, but because I know we're still as close as ever. She's been going through an exasperating new phase in her life where she has an attitude about everything. I thought that didn't happen until they were in their teens. I've had to be harder on her in the last few months and I've tried to spend more time with her as well.

I do have a fear that sometime in the future that we will grow apart and we won't be as close. I've seen it happen for others and I don't want it to happen for us.

Parenting Is A Blood Sport...At Least Today

2010-12-21T07:58:00.001-05:00

When I became a parent I was determined to be a perfect parent. Or least a better parent than mine. I began to read all the books by pastors and Christian psychologists to help make me a better parent. But you know what it boils down to: You pour the kerosene, I'll light the match. Those books can be relatively useless unless you can get your kids to read them, so they know the way they are supposed to react when you use those innovative methods of parenting.

This morning Katie and I went through a moment in which I would be disqualified as Parent of the Year. Everything was fine until I asked her to put on her shoes and socks. She started through the process amiably enough but was having problems with the shoes and began to whine and cry. Not my favorite characteristic of hers. And it was no wonder the shoes are a year old and too small for her feet with socks. And since it was cold outside there was no way she was going out without socks.

I began to help her with these despicable shoes and could not make it any better. And she whined and cried and whined and cried. Finally I had enough, I grabbed her, ready to spank her and I stopped. Never when I'm angry. Instead I grabbed those evil shoes and threw them into the garbage.

She was crying still but now she wasn't whining. I put on her tennis shoes. We got in the car and I dropped them off at the baby sitters. I hugged and kissed her good by. I got back into car hoping that little ball that was sitting in the center of my heart would move soon. It's going to be a long day.

It's Settled...For Me

2010-12-07T08:40:00.001-05:00

I have finally settled it for me, for now. What is it you ask? It is election. I have read extensively over the last few months on this topic of "Limited Atonement." This is the idea that before time began (you know God created time don't you) God chose those who he would save and those who would condemn to Hell.

In all my humanness, this was something I could not accept. But ultimately I wanted to know the truth, whether I agreed with it or not. So I read and read and read some more.

I have ultimately concluded that Jesus died for all knowing that all would not receive Him.

Now as far as those who disagree with me. I know that there is no way that was an easy belief for them to accept and I do not believe that there is any apostasy, because while is clear to me, I can see how it could be interpreted differently.

Now to get with spreading the Good News of Jesus Christ.

May 21, 2011 - Noah Knew, WeCanKnow! Christ's Return on Judgment Day: May 21, 2011

2010-12-06T12:39:00.000-05:00

I have to wonder if people out there are reading the same Bible I am. Things like this makes it difficult to tell people about Jesus.

May 21, 2011 - Noah Knew, WeCanKnow! Christ's Return on Judgment Day: May 21, 2011

Weekend Notes...

2010-12-06T11:33:00.001-05:00

It was a very good weekend. I know that's why you dropped by, to find out how my weekend went. I can't remember what we did Friday night, and no alcohol was not involved.

Saturday we went to breakfast with my mother-in-law. She's in her eighties and a good friend recently died, so we just thought she may need some more company. We hadn't told Katie about Charlie, but she asked and we told her. She didn't take it extremely well or extremely bad. She was upset for as long as a five year old can.

We were all in bad need of a haircut so we went to Terri's. Terri has been cutting my hair on and off for years. I love her and her husband they've been good friends to me over the years. I did find out that Mark has been really sick, you will want to add him to your prayer list.

When we got home, Janet and Katie went up to take a nap. I was left to take care of Sammie. If she would have gone to sleep so would I. When Janet and Katie got up, I went up to take one myself.

Saturday evening we went to see the lights in the city park, as usual they were beautiful, and Katie was so excited. It was fun, but it just shows that she is growing up and fast. I wish she would slow down somewhat.

Sunday we went to Sunday School and Church. I went down to help in the nursery, because they were shorthanded. No kudos here, I missed last week so I owed them. Janet took notes for me, she never takes notes. What a great wife!

I ended the weekend by taking three five year old girls to Taco Bell and Awanas. I'm thinking I'm in need of a psychological examination.

Name Change...

2010-10-23T20:20:00.001-04:00

If you read this at all you'll notice I've done a name change for the blog. On a whim I did a Google search for "Two Fathers." It came up with a bunch of sites for homosexual fathers and I didn't think that would fit with my Christian blog. So I decided to change it to Our Rec Room. In our home that's where we watch TV, play games, read, and study. I hope you like the new name. And I hope I get better at writing.

As Much As You…

2010-10-20T20:51:00.001-04:00

I met a woman the other day. I walked past her on my way to lunch. I knew before I got there who she was, one of the increasing number of homeless around here. I walked by ignoring, but noticing.

I thought about her while I was getting my lunch and my free pastry. I wondered what I should do, if anything. It bothered me that I didn’t do anything. Should I give her money, or buy her lunch. If I give her money is that enough. I didn’t just want to give her money and just walk by.

I stopped on the way back and talked to her. I asked her what happened to make her homeless. Was she getting help from the local churches? How long had she been homeless?

After talking with her, I gave her a few paltry dollars and walked on, not really feeling great. She said “God bless you.” I wondered if what I did was enough.

What’s really funny: I never asked her name…

In His Time

2010-10-14T08:31:00.000-04:00

In His time... Sometimes those word seem so trite. It's as if we are trying to sound so spiritual, when inside we are boiling over with impatience. We forget how God has blessed us in the past and how His ways are not our ways. We live in a fast food society. There is no such thing as stopping to smell the Roses anymore. We forgotten how to wait upon the Lord. But when we do, He blesses us. He gives us strength and stamina. He takes us to heights that we have never seen before. We just need to learn to wait.

This is the lesson that I've learned in our journey to adopt Sammie. I can remember telling Janet when we were talking about adoption, "I don't see how this is ever going to happen." I had gotten to the point, that I was just going to give up, and God gave us Sammie. I am so overwhelmed with the graciousness of God.

My next prayer is that Janet will be able to stay home for the children. I really don't see how that is ever going to happen. I'm excited to see how God is going to bring it about.

Frustration

2010-10-08T22:03:00.001-04:00

Lately I’ve been frustrated. Not at anyone thing in particular, but it seems to be about everything. I have so much I want to do and be and I always seem to come up short. I know of course, in my head, that I can’t do in my own strength. I need to wait on the Lord, I really don’t think there’s anything harder.

I really want to be regular on this blog. I given it to God and I’ve stopped writing. I think in some way I feel I can’t measure up, but I know the standard. God doesn’t expect that, he expects obedience, I wonder why I can’t leave it at that.

A Moment of Wonder

2010-07-23T11:23:00.000-04:00

I went to wake Katie up this morning and I as I did, I couldn’t help but stop and stare with amazement and wonder. She was there, so quiet and peaceful. I really didn’t want to wake her. It was inconceivable to me that this was the same wonderfully imaginative, rambunctious child that a mere hours earlier was dancing and singing, making Janet a top candidate for Eastern State.

Katie is like that. She doesn’t really watch TV as much as has it on. I think she’s seen “Tom and Jerry” about a hundred times. Most of the time she is either engaged in a musical performance the likes you have never seen or some dramatic reenactment of some Barbie movie she has seen more times than there are stars in the sky.

I am constantly being amazed and astonished by her and I’m looking forward to seeing Sammie and her continue to create those moments of wonder.

High Places

2010-07-15T08:49:00.037-04:00

Thanks to my wonderful, beautiful wife I was able to go to bed early last night. I woke up about 3:00 AM to go to bathroom. (I know TMI) While I was up for that short period of time, I began to think about the books of the Bible I had just finished reading. I had just finished reading Kings, and it occurred to me that the same theme was rampant throughout the two books. It would read something like this “And so and so became King and he did evil in the sight of the Lord.” This usually had something to do with not putting away the high places and sacrificing to other gods. Every time I read that I would shake my head and think “They are just not getting it.”

But last night I began to wonder if I was doing “evil in the sight of the Lord.” I began to realize that I sacrificing my time to my other gods, which are television and the things I did on my computer. It’s not what you think, I like to surf the web and play games.

I don’t think either of those is inherently evil, however if you put them before God then it is sin. And that’s what I’ve been doing. My schedule is something like this:

Get home from work about 4:00 PM.
Eat dinner.
Watch TV until about 9:00 PM.
Read until 9:30 PM.
Read my Bible for 15 minutes.
Pray for 15 minutes.

Do you see the problem here? And if I were particularly tired, guess what was omitted.

As far as television is concerned it’s not like I was watching anything new or of value. I have cable and over 200 channels and often we would “there’s nothing on,” but still settle on a rerun of something, rather than turning off the television and reading a book or playing a board game.

Do you have something in your life that you put ahead of God? I hope and pray that through God we can tear these things down and offer ourselves to God as a “living sacrifice.”

Fatherhood

2010-07-13T20:08:00.001-04:00

For those of you who don’t know, Katie is really my granddaughter and that is by my wife’s youngest daughter. So when Sammie became a part of our family I became a father not in just name alone.

When we brought Katie home I was content to be “Poppa” for her. When she started to talk she started calling everyone “Mommy,” including me and the other kids in the day care.

As she got older she learned to differentiate names of different individuals, so then I became “Poppa.” I loved it.

I remember the first time she called me “Daddy.” We were having a party and she wandered through the house hollering for “Daddy.” There was no real urgency, she just wanted something from me. I don’t remember what.

One day I picked her up from daycare and she was having a conversation with one of the other children. I believe they told her that I was “Poppa” and not “Daddy.” She turned to me and asked “Are you Poppa or Daddy?” I said “Honey, I’m whoever you need me to be.” She turned to the other child and said, “That’s my Daddy.” I’ve been “Daddy” ever since and glad to be.

Welcome Baby Sammie

2010-07-12T19:32:00.001-04:00

It’s been a long week, but a great week. Last Monday, the 5th of July, we made a special trip to Dairy Queen. The next thing I know Janet’s looking at Stephanie asking her if she needed to go to the hospital. Stephanie said she wanted ice cream first.

We ordered ice cream and sat down. After watching Stephanie have a few contractions we knew we needed to move. We made our way to the hospital and began the wait. About 7:00 or 8:00 I took Katie home and let her get some rest.

At about midnight Janet texted me that they had decided to do a c-section. So I got Katie up and we headed back to the hospital. We arrived at the hospital about 12:30. Janet came down to meet us and we waited.

Sammie arrived at 12:53 but we didn’t get to see her until the next morning. But we hung around until about 4:3o hoping to see her. Finally I took Katie home, but she was up by about 8:30. She was anxious.

Sammie makes a great addition to the family and Katie loves her immensely. She is always asking to feed her or hold her. That’s Katie holding Sammie with Janet’s help.

After five long years we have been blessed with an adoptive child. I’m glad I didn’t have to wait as long as Abraham.

Time

2010-06-30T21:22:00.001-04:00

“I don’t have time.” How many times have we said that? I think about that every time I don’t read my Bible, pray, or write this blog. Janet is always telling me she doesn’t have time for things, then I ask her how much time she spends watching TV.

To be perfectly fair, if anyone doesn’t have time, it’s Janet. She goes to bed very early and gets up very early. She cooks and cleans house.

But I digress. We seem to find time for everything except for what’s we believe is really important. I’m praying for discipline to start using my time usefully.

The Evil Snooze Button...

2010-03-25T09:05:00.001-04:00

Why is it that when you know what is good for you you don't do it? You may even want to do but you don't. I think it boils down to the passage in Romans 7:

19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.

20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

I find it increasingly difficult as the week goes on to get up and have my quiet time. I heard someone say recently that the "snooze button is evil." I'm beginning to think they are right. I set my alarm to get up, I want to get up and have my quiet time, but the snooze button beckons. Ah, the limited pleasure of an extra 10 minutes of sleep. But how does that compare to the eternal blessings of spending time with God. It really doesn't. I know this in my head. I know this in my heart. I know intellectually and I know this experientially, but I still hit that snooze button. So let me get you to pray for me again and pray for less slothfulness and more diligence in my quiet time.

It's Critical

2010-03-24T12:31:00.001-04:00

Romans 14:10 “Why do you criticize and pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you look down upon or despise your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of God.

(12) And so each of us shall give an account of himself - give an answer in reference to judgment - to God.

(13) Then let us no more criticize and blame and pass judgment on one another, but rather decide and endeavor never to put a stumbling block or an obstacle or a hindrance in the way of a brother.” (The Amplified Bible)

I don't normally read the Amplified Bible. I found this after I did a search on a "critical spirit. " Why was I doing a search on a "critical spirit" you ask. Funny you should ask, I was going to tell you anyway.

It was brought to my attention that I may have a critical spirit. It was God who brought it too my attention. I made a grievous error and asked Him to show me my sin. I say that because, you really can't ask God to do things you really don't want Him to do. I mean surely I had no sin, right? Wrong. Anyway I digress.

Things have been good in my spiritual life, I could feel the moving of the spirit. But I don't want to rest on my laurels as they were. So I ask the Lord to help me grow more and to remove all obstacles of my life. One day while listening to John MacArthur speak, I got out of his sermon that there were those who did experience the joy of the Lord because of a critical spirit. His words seemed to get louder at that point and it is now the only thing from the sermon I remember.

I've noticed lately that I have become increasingly critical of those around me. My family, bless them, are some of the ones who have negatively benefited from this criticism. But they are not the only ones on whom I bestow my critical eye. It has kept me from rejoicing with those who lives the Lord is working in.

It is my prayer that the Lord with remove this spirit from me and teach me to be an encourager.

Moments Like This

2010-03-11T08:59:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I got her up and took her to school as I do nearly every morning. There were a few arguments as usual, but generally a good morning.   I got her to school and said bye to her. We didn't see each other all day. It's really not that unusual.

I finished the day at work. Called Janet to let her know I was on my way to church, it's Wednesday. I arrive before they did.   I waited and played on my new Motorola Droid (It's not an advertisement even though I like it).

There's a bang on my window, it's her. I get out of the car and she says "Hold me!" I pick her up and receive those wonderful hugs that fathers always dream of.   It is the highlight of my day and I can't wait to see her today.

Better Than I Deserve

2010-03-10T08:22:00.001-05:00

You might think from the title that I was talking about what Jesus has done for me. In most cases you would be right, but today I'm talking about my wife Janet. I have to tell Janet does not like the spotlight. She'd prefer to fade into the background and not be noticed at all. But I can't help but notice her. I think she is the most beautiful woman on earth. Which is why I don't understand why I have never written specifically about her.

Janet packs my lunch for me almost every day. Yesterday she packed me an orange, pretty good isn't it? Well, when I peel the orange it was moldy on the inside. I didn't eat it. I told her about it. She was shocked and couldn't apologize enough. I really didn't think there was a need to apologize, things happen.

Today she packed my lunch, and peeled the orange before hand to make sure that it wasn't moldy. Now you tell me, isn't that better than I deserve.

A Kid at Christmas

2010-03-03T09:57:00.001-05:00

I just bought a new cell phone. I haven’t got it yet. But I’m very excited, because it’s one of those new fangled droid phones from google. It’s the Motorola Droid. I’ve seen them in action and I can’t wait.

It is the only thing in my life that I have ever bought that was top of the line or best in it’s class. The research says this phone it is.

Okay it’s not the iPhone, but in order to do that I would have to switch carriers and that is something I’m not willing to do. Besides what does the iPhone have that the Droid doesn’t.

So I’m going to wait patient for the Fedex guy…

Are You a Fanatic?

2010-02-11T17:48:00.001-05:00

Years ago (I’m not going to tell you how many), when I was first saved. I was always reading my Bible. Everywhere I went I read my Bible I even made some feeble attempts at prayer. I would try to tell everyone about my faith. I wanted every one to go to Heaven. I felt like one of my friends when he said “when the rapture comes I’m going to grab the two closest people and say ‘Do you wanna get saved or do I let go?’”

Over the years, the Bible became drudgery, my prayer life became non-existent, and some folks who called themselves Christian made the rest of us cringe. Even if they were possibly right. I used to say “I’m a Christian, but I’m not a fanatic!”

Now I think I’ve come full circle. I would like my prayer life to be better, I’m reading my Bible more, and I want my study to go deeper. I think if you were to call me a fanatic today, I would consider that an honor.

What do you think?

Does Prochoice really mean that?

2010-02-11T10:51:00.002-05:00

"I am blown away at the celebration of the violence against women in it." This is a quote from the president of NOW about the Tim Tebow Superbowl ad. I hadn't seen the one on Focus on the Family, so I surfed over to the web site and watched it. I'm not sure I understand her statement. As one facebooker said "The Betty White ad was much more violent."

It's not even a dissenting opinion it's just the Tim Tebow story of his birth. There is even an offering of help for unwed mothers, and a plea not to kill the unborn babies. I was looking for even the slightest thing that could be construed as violence against women. I didn't see it.

It makes me wonder if prochoice really means prochoice or does it mean "I'm prochoice as long as you agree with me, and kill that baby." It seems that there is an inconsistency there.

Snow

2010-02-10T20:38:00.001-05:00

I’m sitting downstairs listening to the wind blow through the house. Janet and Katie are upstairs in bed. We’ve had at least three snow falls this year and I’m pretty excited about it. I love snow. Janet and I keep talking about moving somewhere where there’s more snow. I doubt we’ll do that, because all of our family is here.

It’s nice to live around family. Where I grew up, there was no family. All of our family was over a days ride away. My friends always had their cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents around. I think it would have been great to have my cousins around. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.

Perfection

2010-02-09T17:35:00.001-05:00

I want to write often, but I’m always looking for something profound to say. I do the same thing in my bible study. I began a study on forgiveness, and I found a simple truth: “If you don’t forgive others, God won’t forgive you.” It’s not earth shattering, not profound, it’s just plain simple.

I’m finding I really need to get over myself. I may not have the talent to be the next great Christian writer, say like CS Lewis. But my mind really doesn’t work that way.

Since I’m a first-born, I think it boils down to what Kevin Lehman says in his book (I like to read) , I want to do things, but if I can’t do them right I’d rather not do them.

Now I’m going to work on doing them.

Parmesan Lost

2009-12-17T14:28:00.001-05:00

A few years ago when Katie had just learned to walk, we were living in an apartment. Why that's significant I don't know except to say that we were living on one level. The reason I tell you this will be clear in a moment. I had been telling Janet how I used to love the Kraft Parmesan cheese for my spaghetti. You should probably know that Janet prefers to grate her own Parmesan cheese, but because she loves me so she bought me some.

We brought the groceries in and Janet put them away. Katie was wandering around the apartment. Later Janet told me that she had bought the cheese but it hadn't been put in any of the bags. No big deal, it happens. She would just tell them the next time she went to the store.

A few days later, and thankfully before Janet went back to the store, we saw Katie with a familiar green cylinder. So that's what happened to the cheese. We couldn't help but laugh.

A Little Scare A Lotta Hope

2009-12-16T13:54:00.001-05:00

This week we had a little scare. Well maybe not so much a little scare. I should really start at the beginning. Someone we know is pregnant and does not want to keep the child. So we are being allowed to adopt the child. The only stipulation is that the child will never know who the mother is. Well we've been trying to adopt for so long, it just seemed to be the ideal situation.

Let's call the mother, Clara, to make things simple. I am going to stress this is not her real name.

Clara called Janet to tell her when she woke up Monday morning, she found a lot of blood in her panties. Sorry for being so graphic. Well, Janet left work to take her to the hospital, and on the way called her mother, and then me. When I got the call, she was sobbing so hard I could barely understand her. I asked her if she wanted me to meet her at the hospital, I knew she would say yes. So I cleared it with my boss and left for the hospital.

On the way to the hospital I began to have a conversation with God. I have to say I was expecting the worst. I told God that I didn't understand why He would get my hopes up and then chop my legs out from under me. I asked if it was that I wasn't supposed to adopt this child or any child for that matter.

I caught up to Janet and Clara at the hospital. I tried to be positive and joke around so that Janet and Clara wouldn't be any more upset than they already were. That seemed to work well.

Finally after several hours in the emergency room we had our diagnosis. (By the way if any one in the emergency room says "I'll be right back." expect them to be gone a half hour) The doctor told us that whenever someone is pregnant and is bleeding it is what they call a "threatened abortion." That's a horrible term for possible miscarriage. He did make it clear that they didn't know for sure, it could go either way.

So Janet made an appointment for Clara the next day.

On the next day, Tuesday if your keeping up with that, I was listening to John Macarthur. He was talking a worship and part of this focused on 1 Thessalonians 5:18 "Give thanks in everything, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." Take a look at that -- "Give thanks in everything," not only for the good times, but also for bad times. So I grumbled a little bit, then I said okay God if that's what you and if this is what it takes for me to make an impact then this is what I will do. It is God who gets all the glory and I will give thanks to Him in all situations, in all things.

I don't know if there is any correlation, but when Janet called me later, I found out the baby was fine. There is a heartbeat and the baby was thrashing about and kicking. And I learned an important lesson.

I Hate Chuck E Cheese

2009-12-14T10:45:00.001-05:00

I probably shouldn't use the word "hate," but I can't think of a stronger word.

We went to Chuck E Cheese this weekend to celebrate the second birthday of Jasmyn. Why would you take a two year old to Chuck E Cheese? But then I digress. Katie loves it there. She runs all over the place playing the games and I usually follow here from one game to the next. At one point I lost her. I searched all over, and even went back to table. I asked Janet if she had come back to the table at any time. Nope. Now I'm starting to get a little panicky.

Then I heard her, she was crying. She had taken her tickets to the counter and was trying to cash them in for a purse. Like she doesn't have enough purses. We need 399 tickets for the purse and we had forty. I went back to the skee ball to see if I could win enough more. Forty-five tickets later.

Janet and I decided to pay the difference, $3.19. I think we spoil her. She was very happy and lo there was make up in the very cheaply made purse, which since Saturday has been all over her face and dresses. I'm waiting for her run out, then she can have more when I'm dead.

It reminds me of another visit. It was Katie's first visit and she ran all over as before and was having a ball. She went with the baby sitter and the other children there. They were older and knew that the tickets equaled prizes. They took there tickets to the counter and were getting prizes and candy. Katie was barely two and she went the counter and look the girl in the eyes and said "I want candy." I don't the girl knew what to do, she looked at Katie and then looked at me, obviously uncomfortable. I asked her if I could buy it and she said I could. So eleven cents later Katie was happy, the girl was relieved, and I was beginning to hate Chuck E Cheese.

That's it I'm a Woman

2009-12-14T10:12:00.001-05:00

Friday I was listening to some of my favorite podcasts and they were discussing how a woman feels about her family. And I thought to myself "That's the way I feel." About the third time I said this I began think "Okay, I'm a woman!"

Seriously I believe that men are the protectors of their families and I am very protective of my family. In fact I'm fiercely protective of my family, much like a momma bear and her... wait I didn't want to go that way.

Okay that rationale didn't work. But I do bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan, cause I'm a wo... Hmmm, this is getting me nowhere.

What is the role of the man? Is there one anymore?

I think there is a least one and that is to be the head of the family like Christ is to the church. That's where I want to be.

God Speaks...

2009-12-11T14:40:00.001-05:00

Most of the time I love it when God speaks. I say most of the time. Lately God has been talking to me about my sin. I'm not really crazy about that. I would much rather just stroll along thinking everything is hunky dory. So much for the illusion of my perfection. I know I'll tell you "no one's perfect," but in reality I think I am. Maybe I should have never told God whatever it takes.

That's not all He's been talking to me about. I suffer from anxiety, to the point I take medication for it. There are times when the anxiety wells up inside of my that I think my chest is going to explode. I know much of my anxiety is self inflicted and God has been speaking to me about trusting in Him. I've been practicing this anxiety for so many years it will be next to impossible for me to overcome.

I think that part of my anxiety comes from my own feeling of self worth. I really believe that what I do doesn't matter. God has been telling me that He is willing to use me if I am willing. I guess if God is using me to do it, wonderful things will happen.

I could use prayer in all of this.

Meanderings From Tuesday

2009-12-02T13:24:00.001-05:00

My last post was not my best post. I think it was borne out of my desire to be more consistent in writing my blog. I'm not really sure anyone is really reading this, but I have always had this deep inner desire to be a writer of sorts. I'm thinking that if I truly want to be a writer that I need to spend more time practicing my craft. It has been said to "write what you know," but I have always thought what if you don't know anything. I may have used that before but as I get older I'm finding it harder to remember my way to work.

I spoke last time about the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, and now I want to share about Wednesday. Katie was home with Janet, and I had to go to work. When I left Katie was still asleep and because she hadn't been feeling well, I was glad. About 7:30 I got a call at work, I was greeted with "Hi Daddy." I can't tell you how excited I was. It was the first time that she had called me at work and I really love these moments. We talked for a while about things that a man my age can share with a four year old. She appeared very excited to be able talk to me. After a while the call of nature hit me so strongly that I had to get off the phone, at least for a short while. She began to cry. Of course. That's my weakness, but I had to go or there would have been a great mess where I was sitting. I told here I would call her back when I had answered the call. By the time I called back she was okay because her best friend, Victoria was there to visit for the day. She did come back to the phone and at one point asked Victoria if she wanted to talk, so I talked to her for a second. Literally. But they went off to play and I was forgotten. Until later.

I had locked my keys in my car so Janet had to drive all the way out my job to let me in. I won't be doing that again anytime soon, either that or I need to find another way into my car. Seriously Janet is such a good sport about things like that, sometimes I think she wonders what she got into when she married me. If she only knew.

The Beginning of the Thanksgiving

2009-11-24T20:45:00.001-05:00

Today I had the opportunity to go to Katie’s school. They were having a Thanksgiving feast to celebrate – you guessed it thanksgiving. I walked in and I saw no faces I recognized. Many of the parents seemed to know each other, I wondered how. It really didn’t matter though, I was there for Katie, so I waited.

Mrs. Holloway came out and gave some instructions, then she saw me she smiled and told me that Katie had been asking if I would come. I’m glad I did, I didn’t want her to be the only child without a parent present. It appears that it is equally or more important to her.

The children entered the room, K4 and K5. The K4 children began with a Bible verse . “Give thanks to the Lord…” It is not the only verse Katie knows and every time I hear her recite scripture it brings great joy to my heart.

Then all the children sang a song -- “Gobble, Gobble the turkey’s in trouble…” That’s all I could catch of the song, but it was so very cute.

Then we ate and spent time with each other. It was a great time and I’m very glad I went. I know it made Katie’s day, it sure made mine.

Pride

2009-07-23T07:12:00.001-04:00

It’s interesting, at least to me, that when I write, I want to write something so profound and earth shattering that it changes the world. I know that’s really not possible, but it is the way I am.

I’ve also notice that when I think about teaching a Sunday school class, that in my mind I will be so good that they’ll have to build a new building just to hold the class.

I guess there’s really nothing wrong with either of those ideas or thoughts except they leave out God. How does God get the glory in those mindsets.

Even on a lower level when people come to my house, I want them to have the impression that I’m super spiritual. (See my cape) I have commentaries and books on the bible on my shelves. I really use them, but secretly I want others to see them.

I’ve been noticing that trend, or more likely that God has been showing me this trend in my thought process. And also showing me that this is pride and this is sin. This is my sin.

She is Still Around

2009-07-22T07:56:00.001-04:00

Jasmyn is still in our lives and we are very grateful. No, she is not staying with us, but Elizabeth has said that she wants us to see Jasmyn every other week. We had to think about this for a second and said “Well okay.” And if you believe that I have some swamp land in Florida for sale. We are ecstatic.

Blaine is going to keep bringing Nivayah around every week to play with Katie. So it seems all is right with the world. Today.

Katie doesn’t seem to notice that Jasmyn is gone. She taken it all pretty well. Janet and I have adjusted well. I think we did all our crying before Jasmyn left.

Now I’m hoping and sometimes praying that I will get the opportunity to share the gospel. I need to go from sometimes praying to always praying. I just have such difficulty in this area.

It’s not that I don’t know the importance of prayer, it’s that right now I find it to be a chore. And many times I don’t know how to start my prayer. I guess that means that those of you who do need to pray for those of us who don’t so that we will. Confusing enough?

Cloudy

2009-07-17T08:27:00.001-04:00

It’s cloudy outside, sort of like my mood. Today I handed Jasmyn over for the last time. It was great to have her again last night, but it was extremely sad to see her go.

Jasmyn was the last of our foster children. Over the past year we’ve had a multitude of children in our home and now our house seems enormously empty.

There has been so much chaos and noise. And although Janet and I griped and complained, we loved every minute of it.

So now we wait to see what God has next for us. I feel like I should be doing something though. I don’t wait very well.

There is ray of sunshine, Blaine is willing to keep coming out each week and visiting with us even if Jasmyn is not there. Katie and Nivaya are going to play together while the adults talk.

It’s amazing what kind of skills you learn as a parent. For instance, carrying on a conversation while the kids scream.

I hope we get to see Jasmyn again.

Janet’s Birthday

2009-07-16T13:02:00.001-04:00

Yesterday was Janet’s birthday. No I won’t tell you how old she is. We decided to go have a nice dinner to celebrate. We had a wonderful time. Katie ate well and was extremely well behaved. I love family nights like this.

Jasmyn will have her final night home with us tonight. The social worker will be there at 3:30 to pick up some things to take to Elizabeth.

Jasmyn’s grandfather and cousin will be over tonight for dinner. Janet and I have discussed it and we would like the visits to continue. Nivaya (I think that’s how it’s spelled) and Katie get along really well and we would like to continue the relationship. We’ll see how it all goes.

More on Jasmyn

2009-07-15T08:11:00.001-04:00

It always seems that I have so much I want to say and when I get to the blank page, my mind is as blank as the page. Anyway I want to tell you that Jasmyn was back for Tuesday night, just Tuesday night. She'll be back again Thursday night, just Thursday night. Don't ask me -- it doesn't make sense to me either.
It is funny because Jasmyn didn't stray far from me the whole evening, I hated to put her to bed. I began to exercise and lay down on my back and she climbed up on my stomach. I'm really going to hate to drop her off for the last time. She has been an important member of our family for nearly a year. Janet and I love her so much.

HE Speaks

2009-07-13T08:25:00.001-04:00

Don't you just love it when God speaks? I do. God spoke to me this weekend. Janet and I have been praying and trying to figure out how to proceed for foster care/adoption. And this verse was part of the our Sunday School class lesson.

(Gal 6:9) Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.

We've been considering giving up and just relaxing, but I think that verse is telling us not to quit, but to continue forward. And we will.
I think sometimes Janet thinks I'm nuts when I talk about this stuff. I asked her about it and she said "I think you're nuts for other reasons." She may be right.
When I say we prayed. I don't want you to think that we are pray warriors or anything. I only wish that were the case. I know prayer is important, but that is mostly a head knowledge and not really a heart knowledge. I think God may be waiting for me to let go.
Katie really hasn't appeared to know Jasmyn is gone. Maybe that's the status quo, who knows. She seems to be happy to have "Mommy and Daddy" all to herself.
That's another thing, she's started to call me "Daddy" and sometimes "Dad." I haven't heard "Poppa" in a while now. It's okay with me, but Stephanie doesn't seem to like it. She hasn't said anything though.
Jasmyn will be back tonight, and Friday she'll be gone for good. Hopefully not out of our life. I have found out that Elizabeth is a good mother who has made some foolish and immature decisions. That gives me a better feeling about Jasmyn going back. I've ordered a Bible to give to her and I hope that I have the opportunity to talk to her about Jesus. If you are a prayer warrior, even if you're not, pray that She is receptive and God speaks to her through me.

She's Back...Er was

2009-07-10T08:02:00.001-04:00

Jasmyn came back last night. Just for one night. She off again today. She's a jet setter. She'll be off hobnobbing with the likes of (gasp) her OWN MOTHER. Yes she will be off to what I think will be the right place for her. Although she will be back on Monday and then off again (for good) on Friday.
It was good to see her again last night. She and I played for awhile, but you know the attention span of your average 18 month old is only slightly less than that of your average 48 year old male.
We had another visit with Blaine, Jasmyn's grandfather. What a good guy. He was surprised to find out things were moving along so quickly, but he did say that Elizabeth was a good mother that made some poor choices. I don't know many 17 year olds who don't make poor choices. I think there are some of us who never grow out of that.
I still have a slight amount of selfishness and want to keep Jasmyn forever. I think that's only natural. I mean she is a beautiful child with such a hearty laugh.
Katie has surprised me. We were concerned how she would respond to all of this and she doesn't even act like it bothers her. I think we as parents over analyse everything.
After this, Janet and I have decided to take a break and heal a little. In the past year we have had Jasmyn, Lindsey, Junior, James, Michael, and four other children in our home. None of them were for our forever family. I'm sad for that, but I'm glad we could be there for them.
If you pray, pray for us. Katie is ours in the respect that we have custody. But her last name is not ours and we want a child that no one else can lay a claim to. That seems selfish.
Pray specifically for the that child and that we are prepared.
In all things Seek God with all your Heart.

His Glory

2009-07-09T09:35:00.001-04:00

I have come to a realization. It's taken me awhile. Some weeks ago while I was praying I made
a commitment to God to glorify Him no matter the cost. In light of all that has happened in the
last couple of weeks, it has occurred to me that this was my opportunity to glorify God. Okay I
know I sound like a fanatic, well I reckon I am.
I remember hearing that some of the young people, who were killed at the YWAM, made the same
commitment. The result was phenomenal. I wanted to make a similar impact.
I think to die would have been easier (I am not suicidal - it is definitely not God glorifying). But
God definitely gets all the glory. How He gets glorified through this is a mystery to me, but he
knows.
I also realize that these situations puts Janet and me in the position where we have no choice but to
rely on God. I'm not a real handy person, but I do like to fix things myself, and now there is nothing
I can do to fix this situation.
I have spent a lot of time agonizing over this and wondering what I had done wrong and all the time
what I was doing wrong was focusing on the situation and not God. Now I know it is time to rejoice
in what God is doing in my life. May he have the glory and honor forever.

It's the Fourth

2009-07-01T13:38:00.001-04:00

It's the Fourth of July and I wish I could say I was looking forward to it. (There's a lot of I's in that sentence) Any way, Jasmyn will have visitation all day Saturday and it's an all day thing. I used to hate when Katie went on visitation, but since her father doesn't come any more, it's not a problem.
The plus side is we're going to Water Country on Friday. It will probably be crowded, but we won't stay long. And we usually go early.

We Must Be Out of Our Mind

2009-06-30T13:40:00.003-04:00

With all that happened last week, Janet and I were unsure whether we wanted to continue with the foster care. But then we began to ask ourselves, "Why we began doing this."

Our most selfish reason was that we wanted to adopt, we wanted to have children of our own. Apparently we are unable to have any of our own. I guess we could go through the whole fertility process, but I think it's better to adopt someone in need of a home.

Secondly it provided a service and stability for the children. The city we live has expressed their concerns about retaining foster parents. When they asked us I couldn't tell you why, I can now.

Third and most importantly, we are beginning to look at this as a ministry. I think that scares Janet a little. But we've in at one situation have been able to minister to a family member of the child we have in our home.

Fourth we can't imagine never having know these children. Even the ones who have been in our home for just a short period of time have impacted our lives.

So now we are going to go back and talk with the social worker and get another placement. We just pray that God will bless the children and their families through us.

The Quest for Children

2009-06-25T10:06:00.001-04:00

I’m going to start this from the beginning. I was born many years ago … wait, maybe not that far back. Janet and I were married in August 1996. Janet had been married before and has three children. I on the other hand, being pretty much a procrastinator, was 36 and never married. Consequently I never had children either -- at least that I know of.

Janet’s youngest Stephanie came to live with us. I don’t want to really dwell on her, because it’s not really the point and it serves no great purpose. I will have to say, because it explains things else ware, that when she turned 18 she began to develop a promiscuous lifestyle.

Around summer of 1998 or 1999 Janet became pregnant with what was supposed to be our first child. The pregnancy barely lasted three months. This was our first heartbreak.

In 2000 we bought a business and began to work that. During that time Janet became pregnant again. I don’t know how, but she knew right from the beginning that she would not carry this child to term. She was right.

In 2001 we closed the business and knowing that I could not make a living without an education, I went back to school. I graduated in December of 2004. During that time period we went back and fourth about whether or not we wanted children at that point in our lives. At one point we said that we did not and that was that – sort of. I still had that longing for children that I kept hidden away. Apparently Janet did too. She approached me one day about that topic and we both recanted what we had previously said and decided that we would try to adopt. Somewhere about June time frame Stephanie became pregnant with Katie.

Janet had seen a show on National Geographic about the little girls in China. We then decided that this was the route we would try to take. Janet attended an informational meeting about adoptions from China and met a couple Chris and Kerry, while I was at work.

During this time I was working as a press brake operator. Great job for a 44 year old man with arthritis in his back. In February of 2005 I obtained a job with a small company as Junior DBA. It was a fair amount of money more than I was making at the time.

Meanwhile we met with Chris and Kerry at their home and began to learn about the adoption process. They had adopted a little girl from China, so they were very knowledgeable about the process. We hit it off right from the beginning and became fast friends.

We had to put our plans on hold for a year because I was offered a job in Northern Virginia for almost twice what I was making -- so we moved. We had finally gotten ourselves in position that we could start the adoption process, when Stephanie called. There were some problems in the relationship she was having and wanted to know if we could take Katie (She doesn’t call her Katie). Of course we said yes. There’s more to this but it’s not really relevant.

Not having anything for a baby in our house, we took the money we had saved for adoption and went out and bought things that we needed to take care of this precious child. (And she precious, exasperating but precious).

The next year I got a job back in Hampton Roads so we moved again.

When we were ready to start the adoption process again, the rules had changed and we didn’t qualify. So we switched to the Vietnam program.

We finished our home study and were ready to begin our dossier. That’s when we got the phone call saying that the Vietnam program was closing because of the Hague Treaty (At least that’s my understanding).

If you haven’t fallen asleep yet this is where is gets interesting. We decided to enter the foster care system with the intention of adopting. We knew from the beginning that every child we had in our home would most likely either be returned to the parent or placed with a relative. But we were determined.

So we went through the training and in July we had Lindsay and Junior placed with us. Lindsay was six and Junior was under two. They were only with us for two months. I learned a great deal during that time.

In August, eight month old Jasmyn was placed with us. Initially we thought she was a keeper. Elizabeth, the mom who was seventeen, had run away from home and was in trouble with the law.

In March we brought nine day old Heaven(we called her Jaime) home from the hospital. We also believed she was to be a permanent member of our family.

Elizabeth has made a remarkable turn around which is something to praise God for. And it looks like Jasmyn will return to her mother. We have expressed interest in a continued relationship with Jasmyn, Elizabeth and Elizabeth’s father. They appear to be willing. During the court day Janet cried several times and I don’t blame her. I felt the loss myself.

On that same day (the court date) we received a call from social services saying that they were going to remove Heaven from our home. The reasons they gave were flimsy and nitpicky at least in my estimation. Janet did not cry this time – she sobbed. In nearly thirteen years of marriage I have never seen her like this.

The social workers have said that they would not block more children being placed with us, but we don’t know if we can continue doing this.

So here we are four years later and no adoption. I can only say that the discouragement level is high. I am attempting to look to Lord in all of this, but I am at a loss as to what to do next.

In Christ Alone.

A Proud Moment...

2008-12-17T13:05:00.002-05:00

Most parents are proud of their children because they're theirs. I'm a proud poppa, there's no denying it. I couldn't be prouder of my "Katiebug." I'm not blind to her childish and selfish behavior. Let's face it she's only three going on four to expect more would be ludicrous. I do spend a lot time wondering if I'm doing the right things as her parent. But I had a proud moment not long ago. I had gone into "Dollar Tree" to pick up Stephanie to babysit with us one night while we went to a party. While I was in there I happened notice pez dispensers for the Disney movie "Tinkerbell." Well Katie just loves Tinkerbell and so I decided to pick them up for her since there were only three, and since the next day was Jasmyn's birthday I wanted to have something for Katie. She doesn't really understand that she doesn't get gifts when it's someone else's birthday. Well I gave her the pez dispensers and she absolutely loved them and began to carry them wherever she went.

One day several days later Jasmyn was upset and Katie was sitting there wanting to comfort her baby "sister" and she slowly handed Jasmyn one of her beloved dispensers. That's a moment to brag about, because it's an indication of where her heart is. She's not perfect and won't be in this life, but I hope this is an indication of where she is headed.

Food Fight

2008-11-10T09:08:00.002-05:00

Well last night I disqualified myself for father of the year. As Katie went to bed she said she was hungry and Janet told her no food. I left the room and went on about my nightly business and finally went to bed about 10:00 PM. About 12:30 AM Jasmine starts screaming I have no idea why, but Janet was handling it and since it did finally wake me up I went to see if I could help. But by that time Janet had managed to get Jasmyn calmed down and back to sleep. So back to bed we went.

A short time late I was awakened by a small hand patting me on the chest. I lifted her into our bed since I knew that was what she wanted. "Poppa, I'm hungry" was next on the hit parade. My first instinct was to tell her no since there was (in my mind) no way this child was hungry. Before she went to bed, she had eaten enough to have fed a small third world village. But she whined and I relented. As I stumbled to the kitchen I muttered to myself (or to the cats) "one day I'm going to wake up and find that she has eaten us." I got some honey ham and brought it back to her.

"No. I don't want that ham." she said as I placed it before her. "I want the other ham." Not being in the best frame of mind at that time of the morning, I grabbed her out of bed and took her to the den where we sat in a battle of wills over honey ham versus lunchables. I did not want the crackers in my bed and we are not running restaurant. Silly I know, we finally after two hours compromised on cereal and grapes and I fed her the cereal so there was no mess. She was happy and I was glad to get back to bed and near as I can tell she still loves me. Lesson learned after bedtime is no time to fight over food.

I Don't Want Them To Grow

2008-11-06T13:45:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I dropped the kids off at the babysitters, Kathy's. As I went to leave Katie reached her arms up to me and whined "Poppa!" I guess many parents at this point would have been annoyed, but although I was cognizant of the time, I was not. I just reached down and picked her up. I could have held her forever. There is just something about when she reaches up for me and says "I want to hold you" that just warms my heart. I love to sit and watch TV with her on my lap and it doesn't bother me when her extremely curly hair tickles my nose. I love and cherish every moment of it. I know the time will come when she will be much more independent and won't want or need me anymore. I'm already beginning to miss her when she was younger, when she had to be carried everywhere.

I remember when she first learned to walk and hadn't learned to talk quite yet. She and I would walk to the mail box when we lived in our apartment. She would chatter the whole way to and from. She would chase after the neighborhood dogs, even though I tried to teach her that you don't run up to strange dogs.

I remember teaching her to walk. Everyday we would come home (Janet wasn't home yet) and I would prop her up against the couch and hold my hands out for her to come to me. What a wonderful day when she took those first steps!

I see Jasmyn learning things differently, she has learned to crawl and she is everywhere we let her go. She just loves to be mobile and I think she may be ready to start learning to walk.

One day in the future I'll be wishing for these days back.

God and the Election

2008-11-05T10:23:00.001-05:00

Well I guess we all know about the election. I'm going to have to say, I am not pleased but thanks to our pastor, I realize it doesn't matter. God is in control.

A Day in the Life

2008-10-29T09:59:00.002-04:00

I was able to get Katie up with little fussing and whining this morning. Yesterday was a wash because she cried from the time I got her up until the time I got her in the car. Bear in mind that I have to get her up and dressed and then get Jasmyn up and dressed. Most mornings she wants me to carry her to the car. I know she could walk, but I know the day is coming when she won't want to be held by me anymore and I'll take all I can get while I can still get it.

About a month ago we took the girls to see Disney on Ice, and Katie hasn't forgotten. Every time we pass by the coliseum she wants to go in to see the "movie." We would like to take her to see The Wiggles next week but we have visitation that night. We're going to ask Jasmyn's grandfather if he wants to go and bring his other granddaughter.

I don't know if Katie is starting to take to the potty training but she wants to wear underwear, I'm taking this as a good sign. We'll see.

I hope that a job offer comes through soon, because this job is driving me nuts. I know I don't have far to go.

A Little Sad

2008-10-27T10:57:00.002-04:00

I've been a little sad this weekend...Started to feel better yesterday, but I think I'm sad again. Sometimes it's hard to explain why you feel sad, just that you do. That's the way I felt over the weekend. I'm not sure I why I was sad, I just knew I was. It's fairly odd when I'm sad because I'm usually an upbeat person with temper. So I'm usually happy or angry, mostly happy.

I started to feel better yesterday, especially when I took Katie outside to play with her. It was a beautiful day, but we could only stay outside for so long, before the mosquitoes drove us inside. Katie would have stayed until she became one big bite.

I was well on my way to recovery when I read April's newest post. I knew that she and Brian had gone through a miscarriage. I wanted to say something comforting, but I knew there was nothing to say. That's what I said -- nothing.

But it wasn't the fact that I said nothing that made me sad. It was remembering that years ago Janet and I went through the same thing -- twice. I remember Janet and I crying, and sometimes if I allow myself to dwell on it, I get sad.

I also remember a well meaning Christian brother (I didn't know him very well), offered to talk. He also told us about his experience. I didn't want to hear it, a hug or a pat on the back would have been better.

And so we want to adopt, not to replace the children we've lost, but because we love God, we love each other, and our love grows. There's plenty of room in hearts and our desire is to become a family.

Katie and Jasmyn

2008-10-23T09:39:00.002-04:00

I love to tell stories of Katie and Jasmyn. Well more Katie than Jasmyn. I love Jasmyn, but she's not really doing a whole lot yet, so there's not a lot to tell.

The other night, I had Jasmyn to myself (with Katie that doesn't happen often). So I decided to teach her to walk (I know she's only ten months old, but she's gifted) . I propped her up against the recliner and held out my hands, she laughed (I told you she was gifted). At least she stood.

About a month ago, I took the kids to the babysitters and one of the mothers (I was going to say other mothers, but I'm not a mother) arrived. She said "If you need help, I'll take the baby."(I think she just wanted to hold the baby). I said "Okay," and then went around to get Katie out of the car. Katie began to cry and said "My Baby." If we have to give up Jasmyn, it's going to be hardest on Katie. Janet and I won't be far behind though.

Consistency

2008-10-23T09:29:00.002-04:00

I've come to the conclusion that everything in life in order to be successful needs to begin with consistency. You want to be a good parent be consistent about you discipline. You want to do well at your job be consistent about your work habits. You want to get in shape be consistent about exercise. You want to be successful in your walk with Jesus then be consistent about your prayer and bible time.

The trouble is, I believe, we live in this fast food society where we can go through a drive through and get a tasty but less than nutritious meal in less than five minutes. And we want to do the same thing all the other aspects of our life. We are bombarded with ads like "Get fit in as little as 10 minutes a day!" And we buy into it. But the truth of it is we are just going to have to make some hard choices and turn off the TV. Get off the couch and start to move, eat properly, read our bibles and pray.

Tagged

2008-10-22T09:05:00.004-04:00

I was sorta tagged by the rebellious April. She tagged anyone who read her post. And my mother had to go and teach me to read. I could tell you there is nothing interesting or noteworthy about my life, but that really not a prerequisite (thank you spell checker). Just random/weird things. (Deep breath) So here goes.

1. I was single until I was 36 years old. It wasn't that I didn't want to get married, but there were a lot (okay maybe not a lot) of women out there that just plain got on my nerves. Before Janet, my longest relationship was about four months. Janet and I might not have lasted very long either but she fed me.

2. I went to college on the twenty year plan. I started at Christopher Newport in 1984 when it was Christopher Newport College and graduated in 2004 when it was Christopher Newport University. If you think you are too old, "fogedaboutit." In my graduating class there was a woman who 69 years old.

3. I didn't become a poppa/dad until I was 44. We were already trying to adopt when we were asked to take in Katie. When we were asked, we didn't have to think about it very hard. We took her into our home and into our hearts. We haven't regretted a day since, a minute maybe, but never a day.

4. I hate driving, which is why you see Janet driving most of the time. She's not crazy about driving, but she hates it less than I do. And she is far more patient than I am.

5. I am completely deaf in my right ear. Whenever, I walk with people I'm always jockeying for the position to the right of them so I can hear what they are saying. If you watch Janet and I, she is almost always to my left.

6. While this is not necessarily weird, it is random and needs to be said constantly: I love my wife. She is the first person who always made me feel important and unconditionally loved. Sometimes I think I don't always treat her the way she should be. But she is the damsel for this knight in not so shining armor.

7. Lastly, but not most importantly, I want to be liked by everyone. I envy Janet because she is. She is very shy and very quiet, but when you get to know her she is also very genuine and everyone likes her. I think maybe I try too hard.

Well that's enough about me, and I'm going to be less rebellious than April and actually tag someone. I'm going to tag Christina Clayton Brandal. One because she's my neighbor and Keith doesn't have a blog, two because she's the only other person I know in the blogshpere that hasn't been tagged and three because she needs to update her blog.

Writing again

2008-10-21T14:07:00.003-04:00

I told someone I enjoyed reading their blog and they thought I was being sarcastic. I don't understand why they would think that. Anyway, they hadn't posted in a month or two, but I had only begun reading it. I was reading the archives. She said that when she blogged she wanted to be witty and entertaining, which I understand, because I think that's why I was so sporadic in the beginning. But I figure I'm only so witty and entertaining so I'm going to settle for not dull and dreadful.

The Heart

2008-10-20T10:06:00.002-04:00

If you have been reading my blog (I'm wondering who that individual is) you know that we have been reading Tedd Tripp's book "Shepherding a Child's Heart." I have begun to realize that in order for me to shepherd a anyone's heart, I am going to have to start guarding my heart and everything in it. I was really made aware of this yesterday when I was taking my children to the babysitter's house. I had my cruise control on riding in the right hand lane when I came upon an exit (or entrance) ramp. There were cars on my left so I couldn't move over and a car was trying to get on the interstate. Instead of speeding up he maintained his speed and moved over in front of me. Well I find this kind of driving extremely aggravating and called him (under my breath) "stupid." I could go on for days about how bad of a driver he was, but the real issue here was how I reacted. Even though no heard me, including the two little ones in the back, this was still about what was in my heart.

Jesus said "But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, slanders." Matthew 15:18-19 (NASB)

Sometimes we get into this mode of "they did this or they did that" and we feel that we are justified in our reactions. But if we use Jesus as our model, we would react differently. I'll confess this is a major issue with me, I usually want my revenge in the form of a harsh word or an evil stare. It is my goal that I become a man of God and I know that the first place to start is my heart. Pray for me that I focus on "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute."

Off Topic

2008-10-16T11:17:00.002-04:00

I know this is off topic, if I really have a topic, but I have something that sort of bothers me. Why is it that when you drive to work and set the cruise control and ride in the right hand lane there is always someone who will speed up and pass you at an extremely high rate of speed, and then get into the right hand lane and slow down. I mean I wasn't going fast enough so they passed me and slowed down slower than I was going. It seems to me that they could have just stayed where they were. Grace, I must remember grace.

More importantly I must remember to pray for Jasmyn's mom (Lizzie) and grandfather (Blaine). I'm pretty sure they both need the grace of God. I would like to see that relationship healed, but it looks like they need a miracle right now.

Are you crazy...

2008-10-15T10:53:00.002-04:00

Well Katie and I had an interesting conversation on Sunday and not very flattering. She had gotten hold of something and I was trying to get it from her without prying it out of her fingers. She ended the conversation by looking at me and smiling while she said "Are you crazy?" There was nothing more I could say or do other than laugh.

Discouraging

2008-10-08T08:42:00.002-04:00

Well, yesterday we spent three hours waiting for the court case for Jasmyn to start. The case lasted 20 minutes without much being resolved. What was ordered was that they were going to try and reconcile (or return) Jasmyn to her original home and if that doesn't work they are going to try to place her with relatives. I suppose it would be selfish of me to hope none of that would happen and that Jasmyn would be placed with us permanently. Janet lamented afterward that we have friends who have adopted multiple children and we can't even adopt one. It is very discouraging.

Writing

2008-10-07T09:15:00.002-04:00

I've always had this hankerin' to write, but I've never been able to sit down and do it. It's just that a blank screen or piece of paper makes my mind go blank. They say to write what you know, but what if you don't know anything.

Shameless movie plug

2008-10-06T12:54:00.003-04:00

Janet and I had the opportunity to have date night and we both wanted to see the new Fireproof movie. We both enjoyed it immensely, and highly recommend it. Go see and let me know what you think.

Kids do say the darndest things

2008-10-06T11:32:00.003-04:00

Well let me introduce you to Jasmyn our foster daughter. She has the greatest smile, although she is smiling in the picture. Katie just loves her and wants to play with her all the time. We just have to be careful that she is not to rough with Jasmyn. At 3 1/2 she doesn't quit understand the need for gentility. Jasmyn has been with us for a couple of months, and the grandfather, Blaine, has just started visitation in our home.

Last Thursday we told him that Jasmyn has started crawling and he wanted to see. So he put Jasmyn on the floor and Katie looked a Jasmyn and said "One, Two, Three, GO!!!" I don't need to tell you the adults busted out laughing.

Introducing the Savior

2008-09-11T12:46:00.001-04:00

Last night we began a group study of Tedd Tripp's book "Shepherding a Child's Heart." Let me start out by saying even though I've read approximately 50% of the book, I like what he's saying. He talks about getting to the "heart" of the matter or the reason children misbehave. The same reason we do, because our hearts are not right. But my complaint is that there doesn't appear to be any practical application. How do we start to introduce our three year old to Jesus? And then how do we address those issues?

Let the Air out of your Ego

2008-09-11T08:05:00.001-04:00

Okay so I'm not so good at this blogging stuff. I can't seem to do this on a regular basis. My goal is to write everyday and if you look at the date between this post and the last post you can see I'm extremely bad.

Last night at church I went down to get Katie from the nursery so that she and Janet could go home. Janet was getting Jasmyn, our foster child. Christina our neighbor from across the street was picking up her little girl, Victoria. (Next story I'm just going to post a cast of characters). Christina said, "I'm so lucky to have a child that makes me feel loved." Apparently Victoria had screamed in delight when she saw her mommy. Well knowing that Katie always screams "Pappa" at the top of her lungs whenever she sees me I said "Watch this", and went in to get Katie. She took one looked at me and said "noooo." I was interrupting an important game of "Duck, Duck, Goose." My ego was severely deflated. Oh well very little lasts forever.

They're Amazing...

2007-04-24T13:43:00.001-04:00

It's been over a year now since we've brought Katie home and each day I find her more fascinating the one before. Janet says that folks in the 20's or 30's don't really appreciate children the way we do. She says she didn't. I don't know if that's true, but I find it absolutely amazing.

When Katie first came into our lives, she didn't crawl, or sit up, or show much interest in anything. She couldn't or wouldn't hold a bottle.

Now it's a whole new ball game. She walks, she talks, she's the AMAZING Katie!! Right now her favorite word is "No!!"

A few weeks ago we were in a McDonald's for breakfast, and Katie was being fairly obstinate. Janet told her to do something I don't quite remember what. Katie told her "No". Janet looked at her and said "Don't tell me no!." To which Katie replied "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I had to hide my face in my napkin.

It really is funny how children go from being a spongelike blob that soaks up the money from your wallet to this spongelike little person who still soaks up the money from your wallet. I keep telling her she needs to go get a job to contribute to the household. But I've told our cats the same thing for 12 yrs to no avail.

She's really enjoys going for walks in the afternoons after I get home from work. Lately she's gotten quite fascinated with dandelions and blowing on them and watching the little umbrellas fly away. It's really interesting when she tries the same thing with buttercups. What do you expect she's only two?

One of her favorite things is to take something that looks like a microphone and sing into it. And she does sing. And she does sing loudly. It is both funny and cute at the same time. Did I mention that she was amazing. There could be some bias there.

Take care til next time.

Jim

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We have met the enemy and they are small.

2007-04-23T15:27:00.001-04:00

So now the weekend is over and I am back at work recuperating. I was called away from work for what cannot be considered a small emergency. Katie's temperature was over 102. Janet located me via cell phone at a luncheon in which we were saying a fond farewell to one of our colleagues.

Being the SuperDad I quickly sprang into action and left - leaving the gent who rode with me high and dry. (Not really - I did make sure he had transportation.) I left the luncheon and headed quickly to the babysitter's. Upon my arrival I quickly assessed the situation - the Baby was crying and definitely had a temperature, you could feel it through her clothes.

She fell asleep on the way home and when I got her home, I put her to bed and gave her Tylenol. (In that order)

Thus beginning a long weekend.

Friday it was my turn to stay home with the Katie. We both had a doctor's appointment that day so it just made sense.

Generally speaking Katie sleeps pretty good, but since the move she has been waking up in the middle of the night. She can't seem to get back to sleep unless she is laying directly on top of me. Comfort for her, not so much for me. I finally got smart last night, when she drifted off to sleep I took her back to her own bed and was able to salvage the night of sleep.

It could be that we let Katie sleep too long in the afternoon, because we have a heck of a time getting her to go to sleep at night. Yesterday we could not get her to go down for a nap, until Janet snuggled her in her arms and let her go to sleep there. Bad day to miss church.

Last night thoroughly exhausted from her antics and trying to get things cleaned up from the move, we lazed in bed and watched TV filtered through a two year olds laughter. After a while we both looked at each other and began to wonder (not seriously) if we really wanted another.

I think you can guess that Katie is fine. Just some residual ear infection stuff, her right ear is not draining right, it seems. Will keep you updated.

Life moves on...

2007-04-19T09:52:00.001-04:00

So I guess today is another day. Well except for the fact that Katie hasn't slept through the night since we moved. Did I mention that we moved? We needed a larger and quieter place. The place we were living in only had 1250 square feet and we moved to a 1450 square foot town home. These probably seem like mundane details, but they were important to us.

We needed a quieter place because the although the first set was new construction, the walls were paper thin. We could actually hear the people next door breathe.

The lady downstairs has come up four times since the beginning of the year to complain about the noise from our apartment. Never mind the fact that we have been living there since last April. I wonder what's changed.

Katie and I have both been sick. It could be since we spend most of the time with each other. We have an appointment tomorrow to see the doctor.

On to adoption news, we have changed from China to Vietnam. Not by choice. They have changed the rules so now we don't qualify. It's okay, I figure the Lord is in this and he has a plan.

I will try to keep you posted on the progress. Hopefully more often too. <><

A World gone mad ...

2007-02-08T14:22:00.001-05:00

Is it me or has the world gone completely out of it's mind. I've just read two stories about two individuals killing their young children.

In one case the the mother "accidentally" microwaved her one month child. As I recall the woman stated that she was "out of it and didn't know what she was doing." I don't think I believe this, it would take two hands to put a child (even a one month old) into the microwave. She would have to some stuffing to fit the child into the microwave - unless it was an extremely large microwave.

The other case involves a man who strangled his two year old daughter. He later stepped in front of a truck and was killed. He got off easy.

They grow..

2006-11-29T08:41:00.000-05:00

It's hard to believe that picture was taken just a few months ago. Cadie is much taller now and walking a lot. It's funny how you spend so much time teaching them to walk and then you want to nail their feet to the floor.

There are so many stories I could share with you that I don't know where to begin.

Perhaps the funniest story is the about the cat's water dish. Janet and Cadie have had this ongoing battle about the cat's water dish. Cadie thinks she should be able to play in it, Janet disagrees.

One morning I was getting Cadie ready to go to the baby sitters and myself ready to go to work. Cadie was chattering away playing in the apartment when she stopped and looked at me and said "Don't tell grandma." Then she headed into the laundry room straight for the water dish. I stopped her before she put her little hands into that water dish.

Soooo Ok - it may not have been what she said since her vocabulary is limited, but it sure sounded that way.

Ear Infections...

2006-06-20T11:45:00.000-04:00

Babies get ear infections. It happens.  It happens a lot.  Cadie got her second one this past weekend.  That’s when I learned that babies get a lot of ear infection.  I know what you’re thinking, “You didn’t know this?”  When you consider that I was 36 when I got married and 45 when Cadie came to live with us, it’s sorta like this “I don’t know nothing bout raisin no babies.”

So Saturday nite we were up with her, until about 2 a.m.  Finally, we had to say “you’re going to bed,” and off she went without so much as a whimper.  Do you ever think we’re making thing too hard.  Sunday morning came – got up without me.  The baby started to cry.  None of which I heard.  A half hour later, they both came to wake me up.  Janet had determined that Cadie had an ear infection in her left ear.  Being super dad (or super granddad) I quickly leapt into action, and got up and dressed and off to the hospital.  Four hours later, the doctor with his many years of experience, confirmed Janet’s diagnosis and we set off for the drugstore.  I’m not going to bore you with the details, but it took a very long time to get the prescription and get back home.

We finally got home at about noon.  We tried to put Cadie down for a nap, but she wasn’t having any of it.  So Janet, Cadie and I were pretty tired and cranky for the company we had coming at 1:00 pm.  That all turned out pretty well and by 5:30 pm Cadie was asleep and 2 ½ hours later so were Janet and I.

Ain’t parenthood grand.

New Approach

2006-06-16T09:28:00.000-04:00

I though I'd take a new approach to this blogging thing. I've always wanted to write and keep a journal. So I thought I'd combine them into this blogging thing.

I also thought I'd try to make this a nearly daily thing. Especially since the whole adoption process has slowed down. We're still doing it but with getting Cadie , changing jobs, and moving, it is nearly impossible to continue with the adoption at the speed we wanted. But as the Bible says "His ways are not our ways". So we just have to continue on.

I know this thought has occurred to others, but it seems to me that if you are pro life, you are also pro adoption. What I mean is it would seem that these organizations that make such a fierce stand against abortion would make an equally fierce stand for adoption.

I'll give you an example the Southern Baptists (I'm Southern Baptist), I took some time and searched there web site for any information they have for support of adoption, and found very little. Of course I'm not going to stop there, I'm going to start writing the leadership of the Convention and see if this is something that we can change.

I think we all need to get on this bandwagon, children can't help themselves.

Before I go let me share a picture from Cadie's first birthday.

So Much...

2006-04-27T10:38:00.000-04:00

It’s almost been three months since the last post, and so much has happened.   Janet and I have decided to put the adoption on hold until the end of the year.  I know, I know, it seems like a drastic action, but wait until you hear why.

Well first thing that happened was they raised our rent.  Okay, it happens all the time no big deal, right?  Wrong!!  They decided to raise our rent by over $200.  I don’t know about you, but I consider this a very significant increase.   By the way if we went month to month and didn’t sign a lease, they were going to charge us $400 a month more (not in addition to the $200).  So we decided to move.

Well since we were going to move anyway, we thought “Why don’t we pay off our credit cards?”  This seemed like a good idea since we didn’t have that much in credit card debt and we could pay it off in a few months.

Then the big thing happened.  Stephanie, Janet’s youngest daughter, called.   To tell you about her is an extremely long story.  And I do mean LONG.  She wanted us to take custody of her daughter Cadence Rene (we call her Cady).  Well, we thought about it for a few seconds (if that long) and we said yes.  And a car trip and about a thousand dollars later, we welcomed Cady into our life.  Don’t get hung up on the thousand dollar part, that’s just an illustration of why we’re going to wait.

Finally, we transferred back to the Newport News area.  We found a nice apartment, and just recently moved back.  I’m happy to be back, I’m not so sure about Janet, but time will tell.

I could have told this story in greater detail, but I’m saving that for the book (.   At any rate, that’s why we’re waiting until the end of this year to finish the adoption.

I’ll try to update more frequently.

Take care and Praise Him Always,

Jim

Home Study Started

2005-12-20T07:41:00.000-05:00

We finally started our home study. We met Kathy (our social worker) at Panera Bread in Potomac Mills. It was kind of a hectic day for us. We started out with one of our cars acting a little funny, so we took our KIA Sephia. We were trying to get a little Christmas shopping done and get a new coat for me. We were more successful with the coat.

We were looking for the game CandyLand for a little girl our Sunday School had adopted. I incorrectly assumed that the game would be easy to find. It was easier to find closer to home, if you can find the right toy store. That's a whole other story.

Anyway, back to our meeting with Kathy. She is an extremely nice lady, and we or at least I didn't really feel like we were being part of a home study. Just some people talking. I expect that's because they want to see what kind of people we are. I would think that you don't want just anyone adopting children. At any rate we talked for almost two hours, and got our assignments -- working on our biographies. Janet says this is going to be a problem for her, and I'm not sure it will be easy for me either.

On another note, our friends Chris and Kerry have gotten the opportunity to adopt a newborn baby boy. It's sort of a long story, but suffice it to say God is working in this. The funny thing is they said they were through adopting, but you know God had other plans. Janet is somewhat envious. I am too, only because I can't wait to be a father. All in God's time.

Keep praying for us.

In Jesus' Name,
Jim

Update

2005-11-30T21:08:00.000-05:00

Well, it’s been a while since I’ve last written. So what’s new you say….

Our friends, Chris and Kerry, were traveling to Maryland to reunite with some of the folks they traveled with when they adopted Nicole. We met them at Potomac Mills and went shopping. I’ll have to admit, I was a bit tired (I worked that day and went in to work early). I was also hungry, the combination of the two made a tad cranky. Not to bad, because I enjoyed myself. We went to the Silver Diner to eat, I love that place, especially for breakfast. Well I had a great time. They sat Justine, Chris and Kerry’s youngest, in a high chair right next to me. Well I think she was just as happy as I was to eat, because she seemed to have a ball. She was eating spaghetti noodles (and playing with them too). I thought the whole thing was hysterical. Especially when she placed her sippy cup smack dab in the center of her plate of noodles. I don’t understand why Chris would say that my daughter will have me wrapped around her little finger. They came back to our apartment and stayed the night. The girls were both frightened and fascinated by our cats. I guess I should say cat, because Athena (the temperamental one) hid the entire evening and next morning until they left. Aphrodite is much friendlier and was out investigating the new folks. They left the next morning and we missed them almost immediately. That's a picture of Justine up there. Isn't she a doll baby.

We received an email from our agency about a couple in our area that is going through the adoption process. The wife's name is Barbara, I don't rember the husbands name. right now they're waiting on their referral. Well I called them and spoke with Babara and she is extremely friendly and nice. We made arrangements to get together Sunday, December 4th. I'll post more on that later.

We finally heard from the agency about our homestudy. We need to get our birth certificates and our marriage certificate together. Barbara told us we probably should think about our autobiographies as well. I guess we'll find out more, when we meet with the social worker.

If anyone is reading this, please pray that all our finances will come through and that the entire process goes smoothly.

In our Lord Jesus' Name.
Jim

The Beginning

2005-11-07T09:48:00.000-05:00

We love children. It's really as simple as that. My wife, Janet, and I, Jim, have been married in the excess of nine years and never had children. Well let me qualify that, Janet has three girls from a previous marriage. Those girls are all adults now.

For various reasons Janet and I wanted to have children together. We didn't seem to be able to have children biologically, so we opted for adoption. Janet had two miscarriages, if you have ever gone through this experience, you know how heartbreaking this can be.

Janet and I discussed at length whether or not to adopt. Ultimately we decided to adopt from China.

I know, why China? Well, once we decided to adopt we began to toss around domestic vs iternational. We discussed minority and biracial children. We couldn't make up our mind. One day Janet was channel surfing and came across a National Geographic program about Chinese orphans. These little girls are abandoned for at least two reasons.

China has a one child policy.
Boys are preferred to girls.

Well, it was clear that these girls had a need and so did we. Maybe we could fulfill each other's need.

Fastforward to January 2005, I was thumbing through the newspaper, which was a miracle in of itself (I prefer the comics), I spied an ad for an information meeting about Chinese adoptions. I called about it. Janet and I were set to go. But alas I had to work on the very day of the meeting. I felt sure that Janet would not go by herself. Janet almost didn't go, but Carol, who was holding the meeting, called and invited us personally. So Janet stepped out of her comfort zone (our second miracle) and went to the meeting.

While at the meeting, Janet met a couple, Chris and Kerry, who had adopted a little girl themselves. They gave Janet their number and told her if we had any questions to call. Janet did and they invited us over. They shared with us their adoption experiences and we had the priviledge of meeting Nicole, their daughter. I should mention we have become good friends and they have gone back for their second daugher Justine.

Anyway on October 29 we turned in our initial paperwork for the adoption process. I know this blog was long hopefully the rest won't be quite as long.

Hopefully this blog will chronicle our adventure in adoption.